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Darker is better.


That’s the lesson to be learned from the Batman franchise.  We went from a corny Batman in tights and external jockstrap(see above) to a stiff Batman with nipples (Clooney).  Holy Cheese!


Then we got the Dark Knight (see above).  Layered.  Dangerous.  Edgy.  This we got.  This was good.

James Bond got it, too.

Back when, he had a kitschy cool that came off a little goofy (see above).  In his impeccable tuxedo, he played women like dominoes, always with a plastic smile that made you think of kitchen linoleum.  He had his practiced one-liners, chock-full of hokum.  He tried too hard.

Then we got Daniel Craig: cratered, craggy, crackling.  A Bond with a past, with gravitas, a heart of darkness, a tortured soul who didn’t let on.  This we got.  This was good.

craig bond

Like Batman and Bond, Jesus needs a renovation.  He needs to be darker.

This is Jesus today:


It’s not that we need to create a new Jesus.  But we do need to draw out a Jesus of the gospels who has gravitas and raw soul.  Because the current evangelical Jesus does not inspire.  This Jesus is an embarassing conglomeration of Homer Simpson and effable Buddha.  He is insipid, irrelevant, clueless, naive.  Holy cow, he would make for a great kindergarten teacher!  Oh! the practical jokes we could play on him!  But savior of a dark, damaged, deranged world and people?  This Jesus?  Not so much.  This Jesus mollilfies the naive and sweety-sweet, yay Jesus church, but not so much the mud-covered urchins that most (all) of us are.


As your Jesus is, so your heart is.  A blissfully clueless church has created a blissfully clueless Jesus (see above).

Fact is, the gospels depict a Jesus much, much darker and edgier than evangelical Jesus.  One who is not quite so nice.  One who has plumbed the depths of hell (literally), one who has stared evil in the eye and did not buckle, street-smart and people-wise, unwilling to entrust himself to anyone, lonely, brutal, prone to get into verbal and physical fights (he used a whip, maybe because there wasn’t a switchblade on hand).  There was a deep, dark side to him, one that would freeze your blood had he ever let it show.  This is a Jesus who instills fear and awe in me.

dark jesus

I need less of the sweet-sunshine and more of the dark side of the Son.


One Comment

  1. wait this last jesus, he looks like hes from a samurai managa or something. Jesus the samurai…i’ll follow that.

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